June 21, 2018

The Legend of Birdnow's Car

Timothy Birdnow

And now for something completely different.

The hysteria of the day, the fake news and faux anger passing itself off as journalism - especially in this last week with the "Hail Mary Pass" of Trump splitting families story that has the President being compared unfavorably to Hitler and supposed news journalists breaking down and blubbering on air - has us all pretty wrung out. (And it's not confined to the national news; my local affiliates have been hysterical about this too, and I could not even get relief by watching an old Star Trek the Next Generation rerun because they chose an episode about how terrible it is to split up families!) clearly we need some levity to restore our sanity.

I got mine last night in a strange and marvelously silly dream and I thought I'd share it with you.
Now, i don't really believe that dreams mean anything. Rather, I think dreams are an artifact of neurological housekeeping, a way to throw away odds and ends that aren't needed. But many people do think there is some deep psychological meaning. If you are one such you can draw your own conclusions.

Anyway, in my dream I am good friends with a fellow from a tiny mountain kingdom in Asia, a place that is essentially a rich suburban community and that is all. The news reports that Kim Jong Un was planning to invade it and my friend became quite agitated, vowing to go to defend his home. I and my wife and members of her family decide to go there and help defend the tiny country.

But first I have to do some errands, obtain passports and the like. While doing that I drive into a sort of industrial court and my car gets stuck in a pile of debris beside a dumpster (it was a huge pile of all sorts of plastics and old drywall and whatnot.} I leave the car running and get out, trying to scrape debris out from under the vehicle while occasionally trying to give it a little gas to rock it over some of the trash underneath.

Well, all of a sudden it breaks loose and my care begins driving away, too fast for me to catch it. I chase on foot for a minute or two, but slow to a stop and stand there watching my car driving off down the road without anyone at the wheel. I expect it to veer off and crash any minute.

But it never does, and it simply disappears down the road.

I call the police and they begin searching for it. Many witnesses come forward to tell of seeing the car carooming down the street without a driver, a kind of ghost car.

My whole family learns about this, and my sister-in-law tells a reporter friend who works for one of the major wire services. The story becomes a major national news story, the story of Birdnow's car, a sort of Flying Dutchman Legend.

That evening, with the plans to go to the tiny kingdom abandoned, I attend a small party of people I knew in college and one asks me about it. I explain how the insurance company wouldn't cover the loss because there is no clause in the policy providing for cars that just run away. A fellow at the party says how people are reporting siting of the car from all over, telling of seeing it parked lazily under a tree or whanot. It becomes a famous legend, a sort of Bigfoot or Loch Ness Monster tale of the American road. The legend of Birdnow's car, they called it.

I woke at this point.

Now, if any of you have any idea of some sort of meaning to this dream, by all means let me know. It was actually a real pleasure to have such a light-hearted and funny dream. Everyone in the dream was so amused, including myself. I awoke laughing and giggled about it the rest of the morning.

So I hope my sharing it with you gave you perhaps a small smile and maybe even a little chuckle. In these times we sure good use either.

Posted by: Timothy Birdnow at 08:35 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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