Timothy Birdnow

Here's a little rhyme to go with our reason today. With apologies to Robert W. Service.

The Attempted Cremation of Donald J.

There are strange things done there in Washington
by the men who steal our gold
The Halls of Power can sure get sour
when invaded from outside their mold

There are plenty ofl fights and some vicious sound bytes
but the worst that they ever did thump
was the night of dejection when they lost the election
to that orange little toad Donald Trump!

Now Trump isn't pretty though he's from New York City
the pretend home of Hillary C.
She's the Dem's Walter Mitty, a detestable biddy
whose campaign said "hey vote jus because it isr me".

So Hill went on the stump (while her hubby chased rump)
she drank many a bowl of strong brew
She slurred many a word and it all was absurd
a hectoring, noxious old shrew

And while Trump traveled round through the country and town
Hillary liquored up with with Jim Beam
after many a beer she fell down on her rear
and she called it a dark Russian scheme

So the campaign wore on and Hil called us morons
and she promised to kill off king coal
she made a nice sum selling uranium
to the Russian for only her soul

She made many a sale through her private e-mail
and James Comey worked hard at protection
just to stay out of jail meant she just couldn't fail
she simply had to win big this election!

So Obama pitched in as she went for the win
and they planted a spy in Trump's camp
In their plan to devour they made up Golden Shower
and claimed he had Putins good stamp

and so the FBI decided to try a few tricks that they had in their poke
in a fit of dark rage in an e-mail to Page
was a promise to stop Trump from Strzok

When election day came Hillary turned up lame
and the Dems gave a loud angry shout
Despite all of their backing and their claims of vote hacking
mighty Hillary had simply struck out

Collusion! Collusion! they cried in confusion
so Mueller was turned loose on Trump
with an army of rats culled from the Democrats
they intended to give him some lumps

Mueller tossed one guy in jail as he chased that white whale
and he raided Trump's lawyers closed files
he charged Russians as spies (he sure does hate those guys)
and he sure made those media smiles

Now the Washington Marsh can be vicious and harsh
and the snails have their own fierce code
no orange haired schlup will be showing them up
it was past time for them to unload

So they called Trump a traitor and a lewd masturbator
and they hoped he'd get AIDS or the clap
they fake cut off his head and they cheered as he bled
and they prayed things would rot in his lap

The folks at CNN were as mad as wet hen
and they figured the rest of us too
had had quite enough of the endless Trump stuff
that America was turning quite blue

"We guess he's cooked, and it's time that we looked"
but the poll numbers kept steady and strong
the fake talking heads were quite filled with great dread
their assessment was terribly wrong

There was Trump looking cool and quite calm
in the eye of the media storm
and the Muellers and Strzoks and the rest of those blokes
had done little of actual harm

Now the Hill wants to run though we all know she's done
and the Donkeys are tearing apart
they are old and real stale or are just making bail
or are hideous hags full of wart

There are strange things done there in Washington
by the men who steal our gold
The Halls of Power can sure get sour
when invaded from outside their mold

There are plenty ofl fights and some vicious sound bytes
but the worst that they ever did thump
was the night of dejection when they lost the election
to that orange little toad Donald Trump!

Posted by: Timothy Birdnow at 10:31 AM | No Comments | Add Comment
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