Timothy Birdnow

The Gang Green wants to put pretty pink parasols underwater to ostensibly protect the Great Barrier Reef from, you guessed it, Global Warming!

According to the U.K. Telegraph:

"The shade cloths proposed in the report would be anchored with ropes and float on the water surface to protect the corals from sunlight. In an experiment performed in Queensland several years ago, researchers deployed 15-feet by 15-feet sheets of plastic mesh, similar to those used by gardeners to protect vegetable patches.

Professor Ove Hoegh-Guldberg of Queensland University, Australia, writing with Greg Rau from the University of California and Elizabeth McLeod from The Nature Conservancy, calls for "unconventional, non-passive methods to conserve marine ecosystems".

"A much broader approach to marine management and mitigation options, including shade cloth, electrical current and genetic engineering must be seriously considered," the paper says. "The magnitude and rapidity of these changes is likely to surpass the ability of numerous marine species to adapt and survive."

The paper proposes a range of possible future options for ocean management, including selective breeding and adding base minerals and silicates to the water to neutralise acidity. The Barrier Reef includes about 900 coral formations stretching along 1,600 miles off Australia's east coast. Its coral formations and marine life attract about 2 million visitors each year. "

End excerpt.


Now. the notion of anthropogenic global warming, er, climate change, er. climate disruption, climate flatulence, etc. is that carbon dioxide in THE ATMOSPHERE holds heat, keeps it from re-radiating back into space from the troposphere. According to the hypothesis there is no change in the overall energy entering the system, just leaving it. The sun is considered largely immaterial, a big light bulb in the sky. The important thing is the balance of atmospheric gases, and an increase in carbon dioxide makes the air hold more heat. Not the water, but the air.

So how do underwater "umbrellas" change the dynamic in any way? That would only make a difference if there were increased solar irradiance OR severe ozone damage. It has nothing to do with global warming.

And what will eternal shade do to the plants (and animals) that dwell below?

And now these people are talking about dumping pollutants into the water to neutralize acidity, and electrocuting the poor corals to protect them. Sounds like Medieval medicine to me; leeches and blood-letting to purge the patient of "poison" that more often than not let to the demise of said patient.

By the way, the strong El Nino is the culprit in coral reef devestation worldwide, and the reefs recovered marvelously after the big 1998 El Nino season. It's warm WATER than hurts them, and the only way to protect them would be to build undersea walls to divert the warm water (see, walls DO keep out unwanted guests; take THAT all you who say fences and walls won't stop illegal aliens from crossing the border!) Of course, diverting the flow of water will have detrimental effects across the globe.

But then so too will this attempt at transgendering the coral reefs with dainty little parasols. I wonder which batrhooms the corals will be allowed to use? Will Australia pass a potty parity/peril law? Will corals be permitted to choose whether to be "hot" or "cold" fish? Will this be the new liberal civil rights campaign?

Will we have to have coral "safe spaces" where the effeminate coral can be protected from those mean jock coral who like to make fun of them?  Will we have coral "high heel drag races" and clubs established in New Orleans for the transgendered coral?

These people have truly lost touch with reality.

Posted by: Timothy Birdnow at 09:04 AM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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